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“My biggest worry, just like many other parents, would be the uncertainty that the world brings when you’re not there,” said Christopher Cuzul, a sales manager at O’Reilly Auto Parts in Bakersfield, California. His five-year-old, Christopher Jr, is starting kindergarten this year. “You know your child more than anyone else. Not everyone understands how they act or what they need,” Cuzul said.
Christopher is one of 10 parents who joined a WhatsApp group to chat with Guardian journalists about how it feels to raise kids now – at a time of heightened political polarization and when social services are perennially on the chopping block.
We sought out parents across four California and Texas regions that Boston University researchers identified as areas with low “child opportunity”. In these places, young people have less access to resources outside a parent’s control, like clean air and quality schools or parks.
These parents’ perspectives will help shape our recently launched series Unequal Beginnings, which asks why it’s so hard for children and families to thrive in the United States – one of the wealthiest countries in the world.
Here’s an excerpt of how our first chat went. Given the time of year, we started with something at the top of most parents’ minds: the beginning of school.
Ava Macha – The Guardian Hey everyone! A question for you since school is almost back in session (or has already started): What are you worried about for the start of this school year?
Jennifer – Bakersfield, CA My biggest worry is that my kid is going to misbehave in class and be a bully. Joaquin is the biggest jokester, always clowning around. But that can lead to teasing when it’s not nice and clowning when it’s not time.
Alyssa – Apple Valley, CA [My four-year-old] Ikora has got another year before she joins TK [transitional kindergarten] since she has a late September birthday and I’m honestly quite glad for it. Ikora is definitely showing signs of ADHD and I’m trying to work with her, especially with the emotional regulation. But I have faith she’ll be able to defend herself from bullying. Even in daycare settings, she’s protected her friends (particularly her best friend with autism) from being shoved. Her middle name is Valkyrie, and she certainly lives up to it.
Gabriela – California City, CA One of my biggest concerns is breakfast and lunch. I hope he will find the food interesting and try different things, and I hope he gets enough water during the day. He likes a lot of fruits and vegetables and hard-boiled eggs, which I hope never becomes something anyone tries to make him self-conscious about.
Alyssa – Apple Valley, CA If it makes you feel any better, hard-boiled eggs are a pretty common school/daycare snack, so I don’t think anyone will really bat an eye at it. At a daycare I worked at, one snack would be bananas and hard-boiled eggs. It was an interesting combo, but the kids loved it.
Priscilla – Rio Hondo, TX My biggest worry for my seven-year-old is definitely being bullied or being the bully because she does joke around a lot as well. This week we did the toothpaste experiment where you have them squeeze it all out and have them try to put it back in which is impossible lol. Meaning once you say something you can’t take it back so I think that really helped her have another look at it.
Rene – Bakersfield, CA For us, our biggest worry is our kid adjusting to any type of school. It’ll be our first kid to go to “big school” (kindergarten). We’re also nervous because she has a few food allergies and environmental allergies so we’re always looking out for that. My wife made her custom water bottle backpack and lunch pail.
Ava Macha – The Guardian That’s too cute, Rene! On the topic of back to school gear – does anyone have a picture of their back to school school lists? How are you all feeling about budgeting for supplies?
David – Pharr, TX I had the chance to get a head start on [buying school supplies] – I learned last year that procrastination is a killer.
David – Pharr, TX My worry is that I’ll be able to provide enough for my son, Russell. Recently, my brother was clipped by a car and ended up breaking both of his wrists, leaving him sidelined for the next eight to 12 weeks. So I’ve taken the responsibility of buying my nieces’ school supplies, some clothes and shoes. So, money is really my main worry. I cut hair for a living, and it has its ups and downs like all professions.
Ava Macha – The Guardian Thank you for sharing that David, it sounds like you have a lot on your shoulders.
Isabel – San Bernardino, CA My biggest worry this school year is helping my oldest daughter Alina start applying for college, scholarships and financial aid. I hope that we are able to get some help with financial assistance because I know college will not be cheap. Thankfully we started a savings account for her a few years back. I went to community college right after high school, so this experience is very different for me.
Ava Macha – The Guardian An exciting time! But the application process really can be stressful. What are you all excited about for the start of the year?
Isabel – San Bernardino, CA I am also excited for [Alina’s college application] process to begin but at the same time sad because I can’t believe she will be graduating high school in a few months. I can’t wait to see her face when she gets accepted to the school of her choice. If she doesn’t, we will also be there to support her and remind her that everything will be OK.
Jennifer – Bakersfield, CA The thing I’m most excited about is seeing what opportunities there are for me to get involved in the classroom. I like getting involved. I was on the CAPK [Community Action Partnership of Kern] policy council for three years and I teach Sunday school. I love being able to take an active role in my kid’s education.
Gabriela – California City, CA I am excited to hear about the different things he learns and the experiences that lay ahead for him. I’m really excited about the Little Whisk cooking class he is signed up for after school.
Ava Macha – The Guardian Thank you everyone for your thoughtful responses. And good luck on the first days back to school!
